A Reddit user, Postcrapitalism, who describes himself a rust belt bear and almost as hung as Hunter Biden. 🐴🐔, in the subreddit Gay Bros Circle Jerk, which is mostly funny irreverent posts asked his brothers if his irrational fear of being murdered by Grindr hook up was normal aka “The razor blade candy of gay sex.”

[Which is definitely a thing by the way among the most notorious were “The Grindr Murders” by U.K. serial killer Stephen Port, who plied his victims with spiked drinks before raping them and dumping their bodies.]

Q: Hey all 😄 got a question or stories or anything really. So a bit of background, I’m 28yo male. And recently came out to myself… and I’m wanting to take the next steps in ummm enjoying life right.

One thing that has been holding me back is, I unfortunately have watched a lot of those like mystery crime shows and developed this irrational fear that if I go on a hookup I’m going to be murdered for being gay.

There is a change in my life… more so living space where I was thinking of next month going on grinder or however and meeting someone for a first time kinda thing. But again I keep thinking of this one story I watched that where this crazy dude cruised gay guys at bars and yea bad things happened. And I don’t want that to be me D:

Is this a thing? Have you heard of this. Or am I as I suspect just being paranoid? Any conversation or ideas or thoughts would be appreciated ^{_^} thank you!!!!

The answers, in typical Redditor fashion, ran the gamut, but were razor sharp funny. Below are a handful ranked by funniest:

5. TravelerMSY wrote:

It’s an irrational fear compared to the odds of it actually happening. How many people were murdered by a hook up yesterday? What about last week? Last year?

Just know that the odds are vanishingly low, and that your anxiety about it will go away after a little exposure to it. Meet them in person somewhere public first, and get to know them a little if it makes you feel better.

4. arathorn867 wrote: If it makes you feel any better nobody I’ve just hooked up with is missing.

3. Grokker999 wrote: I met a guy online who was a morning TV news producer. He had just done a story on dangers of internet dating. Yet he was ready to take the plunge and connect with me for his first date – ever – man or woman! I don’t know when he first saw me if he was scared I was going to murder him or not but he told me later that he had hid all his valuables and money and was ready to fight if necessary. It wasn’t, and we’re still together 26 years later.

2. (Tie) fxggotbitch wrote: I refuse to host due to the embarrassment of being murdered in my own home by a hookup

2. Ijustfall wrote: Lmaooooo . This is so me . Like woww I didn’t even get to clean my bathtub before I died , now everyone is going to think I’m a slob.

But the clear winner came from UnNumbFool who wrote:

uj/ 1000% troll post, I refuse to believe anything else. Especially because if you look at the dudes history he’s been posting to agb for two years.

rj/ gurl we all want that Dahmer dick, don’t think your hole wont take it

In case you’re worried a week ago he wrote: I just can’t stop sucking dick lol (plz validate me being a slut).

I was sucking my bud’s dick in his dorm and his roommate walked in on us!

His roommate ran away instead of joining in cuz he’s weak. I kept sucking lol.

Then his roommate came back and I sucked his dick too.

Then I sucked his neighbors’ dick.

Then I tracked down his dad and sucked his dad’s dick.

Then I sucked his best friend’s dick

Then I sucked his mom’s dick.

Then I disinterred the corpse of his older brother who died in a car accident and sucked his dick.

Then I sucked his dick again.

When the mayhem was finally over I looked at myself in the mirror, hair soaked in cum and face covered in drool and ball hair. And the face of despair looked back at me. What have I become?

He also says:

“Cherish your twink days I used to be one of those guys who hated being skinny. I used to literally be a twig. “Now that I’m 23 and my twink phase is over I am a little chubby now. I wouldn’t say that I’m fat but I am no longer classified as a twink and my abs are completely gone.”

We are Gay Dead. ☠️